Book Review for 'Feed' by Mira Grant

So I have this zombie…obsession?  Infatuation?  Extreme interest?  Whatever it is.  I have it.

The sciencey side of me is just so interested in what could make zombies actually work.  I mean, every zombie fan has probably heard about the fungal infection commonly seen in ants that (to use layman’s terms) infects their brains so they climb to the highest point possible and then explodes out of their bodies and spreads the spores to the wind.  And that’s real life!!!!

I just get so excited when I learn about new diseases (or new sides to old diseases) that could possibly make zombies.  It’s incredibly fascinating to me and I’m getting excited just typing about this.

ZOMBIES!!!!!!!!!

Okay.  I need to calm down.

Ooohhhhhhhmmmmmm.

I just finished this book.  Aaaaand…it’s awesome.  And zombies.  And politics.  And conspiracies.  And plot twists (but EXACTLY HOW I WOULD HAVE ENDED IT!!!).  Agh, calming down did not work.

So this book is called Feed, and it’s written by Mira Grant.  It’s the first book in a trilogy.  And tomorrow I am getting books two and three and then locking myself in my room and forcing The Man to take care of Stormageddon for the rest of the day because ermahgerd.

Bear in mind, I was not all this excited about the book for the first…250 pages.  I know, that’s a long time to keep reading a book that you’re not all that interested in, but I’d heard good things and I wanted to figure out why.  And it was worth it.  The last 320ish pages were awesome.

The story is narrated by a blogger.  Zombies have risen, blah-de-blah, the world is moving on with life while also dealing with the constant threat of the walking dead, and bloggers have become the most reliable news source.  So this blogger and her team (brother and friend) have been selected to follow a senator on his campaign trail to become the president of the United States.  Everything’s going great, the senator is an awesome guy, and then disaster hits after one of his rallies and lots of people “go grey” and lots of people die.  The team moves on with life, continues the trail, more disaster hits (this is where it starts to become interesting).  Then conspiracies are unveiled.  Then more disasters.  Then death and destruction and disaster and intrigue and ZOMBIES!!!!!!! 

Grant’s a pretty good writer.  She went out on shooting ranges, staged fight scenes, audited epidemiology courses, and more to write this book.  The brother/sister relationship is a little strange, but forgivable.  I mean, they’re each the only person the other has, so it’s kinda understandable why they’re so attached to each other.  I don’t know where I was going with that.

Anyway.  Grant writes convincing action scenes, almost Rowling-worthy emotional scenes (but not quite – this book didn’t make me cry), and it’s easy to get caught up in her writing (after all the character introductions and stuff are done).

If you like apocalyptic/political drama/zombie/question authority books, this is a good one.

I’m just hoping books two and three can jump right into the action since we’ll already know all the characters.

ZOMBIES!

Okay, I’m done.  I promise.

Runner Tip: Try Running from Zombies!

This post is for you, Cuz.

Let’s talk about zombies.  Zombie lore over the years has introduced us to many kinds: the slow-moving shamblers, the ones who can run okay but you’re faster, the ones who somehow got cheetah genes spliced in and their muscles can perform feats no human muscle can, those who eat brains, those who eat anything, those who die with a direct hit to the head, those who can be run over by a car and survive …Sooo many types of zombies, guys.  And so many ways to become a zombie!  Maybe it’s an airborne virus released as a form of bio-terrorism, maybe it’s a strain of rabies or mad cow, maybe it’s an attempt to cure muscular dystrophy, maybe it’s bath salts; whatevs.

I have a love/hate relationship with zombies.  See, I know it’s impossible and their bodies would deteriorate and blah-dee-blah, and I know it’s an illegitimate fear, but I’m still scared of them.  Other people have these fantasies of the zombie apocalypse where they’ll be able to shoot other humans in the head because, well, zombies, man!  I just get terrified when I think of anything wanting to consume my intestines while I’m still alive.  It’s just gotten worse since Stormageddon was born – how can I expect him to stay still and quiet if we have to sneak past a horde of zoms?  How am I going to run as fast as possible while carrying a squirming baby?  What is the proper age to teach a child to use a chainsaw in self-defense?  These are the important questions, people.

Despite all that, I still have this morbid fascination with zombies.  I enjoyed “Shaun of the Dead,” “Zombieland,” and the one episode I watched of “The Walking Dead” before I realized that if I continued watching it I would have nightmares literally every night (thanks, “Supernatural,” for teaching me that).  Comedy zombies I can take.  I just freak out later when I’m walking through the pitch-black house to comfort a screaming baby.

So when I saw the app for “Zombies, Run,” I just had to research it a bit.  Because I’m addicted.  I used to run in high school, and I wasn’t too bad - I could hold a 7 minute mile for several miles.  I haven’t run consistently since junior year of high school though, so now I’m much slower and breathing is harder and my boobs are bigger and my legs are heavier and the globe is warming up and since I had a baby maybe if I run too hard my pelvic floor will collapse and my uterus will spill all over the pavement and I just have many, many reasons not to run.  And just for the record I know that my uterus isn’t going to fall out of me anytime soon.  BUT IT CAN HAPPEN, PEOPLE.

Wow, I am on a roll with tangents.

Anyways.  This zombies app.  How it works is you get little clips of a storyline in between songs on your playlist.  You’re a runner for Abel Township – you have to get supplies.  While you’re getting supplies, distracting zombies, or going on missions you’re being talked to over your headset by the base (these are the storyline clips).  The base has cameras and GPS and all that jazz and so they warn you when zombies are coming and you have to run faster.  If you don’t pick up the pace, the zombies catch you and steal all your supplies (I’m not sure if they kill you or not; it seems like they’re just hungry for canned beans and batteries).  You can hear the zombies groaning behind you if you’re running too slow.

That’s if you’ve got the “chase” feature enabled, which requires you to be outside (no treadmill or elliptical or anything) and have your GPS on.  However, you can turn off chases and just listen to the story while doing your workout. 

When you’re done with your workout, you can help beef up Abel Township with the supplies you’ve collected – very very slightly like Age of Empires.  I don’t think you have to do this though; it can’t affect the story line at all because all the seasons (4 of them) are pre-made.

If you’re a cheapskate like me, they now have a free version, which is awesome.  You get four story missions up-front, and then you can acquire one more every week.  You have unlimited access to supply run missions though, which is cool.  The only buggy bit I ran across was that your playlist will shut off after two songs and you’re just stuck with dead silence (haha) between story lines.  You can avoid this by starting your playlist before opening up the zombies app.

So far I’ve only done a single run with the app.  You can set times that you’re willing to run (25+, 40+, 60+), so I did the shortest amount possible because I’m REALLY out of shape.  27 minutes later I was nearing the end of my run when a zombie came up behind me and I had to sprint a little bit to avoid her.  It was ridiculous how hard that was for me – I was wheezing and thinking over and over “when does it stop?!”  Seven hours later I escaped her (later I learned it had only been a single minute of pursuit).  You know what though?  I escaped.  I ran so fast I didn’t even hear her groaning.  That made me kinda proud.

All in all, it’s a pretty fun app.  You can use it offline, so it doesn’t use up your data, you get to listen to your own music, you get to follow along with the story of a zombie-ridden world, and you have a reason to push yourself.  I’m actually looking forward to future runs, which is ridiculous because I hate running (I figured out why, too.  It’s because I’m so much worse than I used to be.  If there’s something I’m not good at, I’d really rather not do it.  Which is a small-minded and stupid way to go about life).

If you’re trying to get into running (for the first time or the seventeenth time or whatever) and you’ve got even a mild interest in zombies I would try this app out.  And maybe even buy the upgrade to thank the developers for their excellent work (once you’ve mooched off the free one for a while, of course).