How I Stopped Running from Jell-O

I'm one of those people that has super vivid dreams all the time.  The upside of this is some awesome flying dreams.  The downside is some terrifying nightmares.  Sometimes my nightmares are about legitimate fears, like someone breaking into our house and trying to harm us, and sometimes I have dreams about gelatinous blobs chasing me.  In dream world, those things are terrifying.

They're coming after me!

The worst part about my nightmares is my cowardice.  I never turn and fight in my dreams; I always run away.  Usually I'll grab the people around me and try and get them to safety, but dream me just doesn't think it's worth it to fight the threat.  On top of that, dream me is a terrible runner.  At the peak of my running career I could hold a seven minute mile for several miles, and in later years I've still kept in pretty good shape, but dream me can't run worth crap.  It's like the entire atmosphere is transparent molasses and I'm fighting to even get walking pace out of my worthless body.  It is so frustrating to be running for your life while moving at slo-mo speed (luckily everyone else in my dreams is a good runner, so the people I love usually get away).

It was kind of a frustrating thing because all growing up my oldest brother would talk about his dreams, in which people would come after our family and my brother would go all Rambo on them and save everyone.  By the way, my brother is strong, but he's 6'2" and maybe 150 pounds.  Not exactly intimidating.  I couldn't understand why my scrawny brother could beat up his dream villains and I was stuck running from Jell-o.

But.

For the past few months I've been working out in real life, and I've found an exercise that I LOVE: kickboxing.  Pilates is great and all, but I don't really feel like I've exercised unless every part of my body is dripping sweat (there's a lovely visual for you).  Kickboxing makes me work so hard that my eyes have literally stung from sweat, and Michael Bluth was wrong; it is not sweet.  It hurts so bad.

The sweetness of kickboxing comes from feeling my arms and for once there's no jiggle there when I flex.  It comes from taking on the boxer's stance and just feeling powerful and in charge.  Seriously, try it right now.  Stand up, wherever you are, and take this stance: knees bent, one foot in front of the other, head looking over the shoulder of your front foot side (is this making any sense?), hands up in fists protecting your chest and face.

Even better, take the stance and throw a couple punches, like this chick.

Now tell me that didn't feel awesome.  You want to take on the world.  For my workout I punch, kick, twist, leap, and feel like an all-around beast.  And the best part?  I probably look ridiculous.  I'm still a bit jiggly and a lot uncoordinated, but it doesn't matter because I FEEL AWESOME.

So why did I even bring up my dreams if I was just going to be one of those annoying people that only talks about their awesome workout?  Well, my dreams have changed since I started kickboxing.  I no longer run away; I turn and fight.  When I do run I hit full-speed and I'm usually heading towards the danger.  In my dreams I can even do parkour now, which is hilarious because I am dismal at it in real life.  My vertical leap is about two inches off the ground.  

What I'm trying to say is exercising empowers me.  It makes me feel more confident about my body and more confident in my abilities, and the confidence even transfers over into my subconscious.  If you're thinking about starting to work out again, or if you're bored of your current workout, I strongly suggest picking up kickboxing.  You will have the most amazing dreams.